I was up last Saturday night as a pretty bad storm rolled through Ft. Benning. I was the only one awake in the bunks and looked around the room and listened to the storm. I laid there and just thought about it all…the Army, the soldiers before me, those who gave it all. I put my thoughts my paper and this is what I came up with.
By the way…thank you all for your continued prayers and support.
The sky is crying tonight.
I hear the familiar sound of those drops falling.
I see the darkness run from the bolts of lightning.
Listening as it moans with the loudest of thunder,
Wondering why is it tonight that this Georgia sky cries.
Could it be for her soldiers that have fallen?
The best of the best, trained, deployed, and now death has taken?
Memories, visions and pictures rush in as I ponder the stories I’ve heard and read.
The tales of bravery and valor from those now dead.
Just how many have come before? Taken this same path? Even slept in this same bed?
Where are they all tonight?
Are they the reason this Georgia sky cries?
Soldiers…Brothers…push and fight on.
We will move quick through the night, we are coming and joining the fight.
To those fallen, you will never be forgotten.
We will remember and this Georgia sky will keep on crying.
I saw this movie a while back and as I prepare to leave physically, emotionally, and spiritually for the U.S. Army, I can hope that one day I can say a prayer like this. This quote comes from the end of the movie as he has accomplished his mission and calling. If you haven’t see this movie, I highly recommend it.
Anyway…here’s the part I’m talking about.
“Dear Lord, Thank you for giving me the strength and the conviction to complete the task you entrusted to me. Thank you for guiding me straight and true through the many obstacles in my path. And for keeping me resolute when all around seemed lost. Thank you for your protection and your many signs along the way. Thank you for any good that I may have done, I’m so sorry about the bad. Thank you for the friend I made. Please watch over her as you watched over me. Thank you for finally allowing me to rest. I’m so very tired, but I go now to my rest at peace. I fought the good fight, I finished the race, I kept the faith.”
For twenty-six years you have always shown you care
Through countless valleys and even more highs
At times my understanding failed and my faith was shaken
When I had dark days and I was over whelmed by fear
You were always present with love to share
Without you mom, I couldn’t have made it by
Now that your little boy is grown, I can leave and know
In the midst of the storms, challenges, and trials
When the darkness closes in and the enemy seems near
Or when on the brink of victory and when the mission is won
I will again thank heaven for the Godly example you’ve been
Thank you for your perseverance, patience, and passion.
Without you mom, I couldn’t go become the soldier I’ve been called to be.
Life is cyclical. Looking back through history you can clearly see the rise and fall of nations almost as if done in sequence over and over. On a much smaller level I am willing to bet you can even look at yourself and see the cycles that you have gone though. It may look something like what I see when I look back at my life. I make a plan, get motivated, try and stay determined, progress for a little while, and then digress and it all starts over again!
Some say this is how life goes. Well…I am tired of cycles and have been working towards breaking this cycle and figuring out what can be done differently to change this seemingly never ending process. I have been thinking about this for some time and really wanted to change; the lows always seem to be longer, more drastic and more memorable than the highs. Seriously…ask yourself what is going on in your life today that allows your plan, motivation, determination and progress to waiver? What is it going to take in order to “break the cycle”? In my past it can break down into four things.
Inspiration? What does that have to do with all this?
My favorite definition of the word inspiration was on dictionary.com and it is this, “a divine influence directly and immediately exerted upon the mind or soul.” What do you want to do? If you do not have incitement within yourself about something or an idea for your life, then it is hard to be excited about it!
If you are not excited about your plan, then your motivation will be lacking as well. Your motives for doing something is not the what, it is the why. If you go through life with a selfish motivation then when you fail you will be let down because you are the only one that you are trying to impress. Just stop for a second and consider the world around you. Too many times it is easy to get an inspiring idea but then you mess it up by thinking, what is in this for me. By thinking about others and including people in your motivation you will add a level of accountability and this helps you stay motivated.
Inspiration and motivation are nothing without determination. As I stated above a common problem I have had in the past is overzealous determination. I know…it sounds like a weird phrase, but hear me out. Just think about the last time you went to a buffet and overfilled your plate. We all know the saying, “my eyes were bigger than my stomach”. Or maybe you are at work and you take on a project that should take three people and you think you can do it all yourself. You may say, “I bit off more than I could chew”. I looked at the what and why, determination however deals with the how. It’s the same thing in life, don’t overload yourself, or burn yourself out. Pace yourself and keep your eye on the goal. There is another saying and it’s super cheesy, but it goes like this, “go inch by inch and it’s a cinch”. The idea behind this statement is pretty simple and to the point. Don’t worry about tomorrow today; focus on the now and not the future or past. Remember your inspiration, stay motivated and be determined.
While it may be last on the list, procrastination has been something that always caused problems for me. It is too hard to focus on your inspiration, motivation and determination if you are working on yesterdays to do list today. Stay on point, complete your task at hand. In order to stay the course and break the cycle we can’t be worrying ourselves with what should have been done before now, the present is too important
Breaking the cycle is not as easy as it sounds in the title of some blog. I briefly covered four things that I am dealing with, however I started writing this with explaining what inspiration is and not so much how to find it or come up with a plan that is inspiring to you. You may have heard this acronym before S.M.A.R.T. The smart acronym has to do with setting goals. Here is how it breaks down:
S – specific. Do not be vague when it comes to putting pen to paper on setting your goals. M – measurable. Make sure you can gauge where your progress is at. A – attainable. Set goals that can be reached, R – relevant. Your goals need to be directly related to what you hope to accomplish. T – time-bound. A goal without a deadline is just a dream.
If you really want to break the cycle then make smart goals. Find an inspiration that incites you, have a motivation that matters, stay determined, and don’t allow distractions in that lead to procrastination. You have the power to choose the life you lead. You can blame no one except yourself for your current state of mind.
Wrapping all this up, ask yourself these questions.
What do you want to do? Why do you want to do it? How are you going to do it? Last but not least, when are you going to do it?
Grace is a word that has a special meaning to me. This is one of those words that may have a certain meaning to different people. A while back I posted as a facebook status with the question, “What is your definition of grace?” Here are the answers I received.
1. God’s Righteousness at Christ’s Expense!!
2. Screwing up really really bad and while awaiting for the terrifying consequence nothing happens
3. Eternal salvation unto all that obey Him… Hebrews 5:9
4. God’s hand
5. Love which is God, so they are all connected.
6. Getting what you don’t deserve
7. she’s about 5’6″All of these are true. They are true to each of the people who posted these answers. In this blog I wanted to tell you what it means to me and why.
The dictionary has it listed like this. –noun 1. elegance or beauty of form, manner, motion, or action. 2. a pleasing or attractive quality or endowment. 3. favor or good will. 4. a manifestation of favor, esp. by a superior: It was only through the dean’s grace that I wasn’t expelled from school. 5. mercy; clemency; pardon: an act of grace. 6. favor shown in granting a delay or temporary immunity. 7. an allowance of time after a debt or bill has become payable granted to the debtor before suit can be brought against him or her or a penalty applied: The life insurance premium is due today, but we have 31 days’ grace before the policy lapses. Compare grace period. 8. Theology. a. the freely given, unmerited favor and love of God. b. the influence or spirit of God operating in humans to regenerate or strengthen them. c. a virtue or excellence of divine origin: the Christian graces. d. Also called state of grace. the condition of being in God’s favor or one of the elect. 9. Moral strength: the grace to perform a duty.
Now think about the bible verse Ephesians 2: 8-9 “For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God; not as a result of works, so that no one may boast.”
Did you get it? We are saved by God’s “favor” through faith and not because of any one thing we did or can do. Grace is God’s present to us, so we can’t brag on ourselves or what we have done. Another verse and one I think a lot of people have heard or know is in Romans chapter 3, verse 23. “For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God”. This one is pretty to the point. We all messed up, we all sinned and no one is good enough to reach God on their own.
I think a lot of people quote this verse or refer to it and most can not tell you what verse 24 says. Check it out. Romans 3:24 “Being justified freely by his grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus”
We are justified and not just justified but for FREE by God’s grace through Jesus Christ! It is by grace we are saved and justified. Now…we can be and need to be thankful for this grace that we are saved by and justified by through faith and Christ.
However beware that you do not abuse this grace and this gift that has been given to you. Just 3 chapters later Paul warns of us of this in Romans 6:1-2 “What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin, that grace may abound? God forbid. How shall we, that are dead to sin, live any longer therein?” Basically it breaks down like this. Just because God decided to give you grace and allow you be saved by it, do not abuse it. You got right, live right.
I think one of my favorite passages is in II Timothy 2:1-13 “You therefore, my son, be strong in the grace that is in Christ Jesus. The things which you have heard from me in the presence of many witnesses, entrust these to faithful men who will be able to teach others also. Suffer hardship with me, as a good soldier of Christ Jesus. No soldier in active service entangles himself in the affairs of everyday life, so that he may please the one who enlisted him as a soldier. Also if anyone competes as an athlete, he does not win the prize unless he competes according to the rules. The hard-working farmer ought to be the first to receive his share of the crops. Consider what I say, for the Lord will give you understanding in everything. Remember Jesus Christ, risen from the dead, descendant of David, according to my gospel, for which I suffer hardship even to imprisonment as a criminal; but the word of God is not imprisoned. For this reason I endure all things for the sake of those who are chosen, so that they also may obtain the salvation which is in Christ Jesus and with it eternal glory. It is a trustworthy statement: For if we died with Him, we will also live with Him; If we endure, we will also reign with Him; If we deny Him, He also will deny us; If we are faithless, He remains faithful, for He cannot deny Himself.”
So this one was a bit longer and a little more to take in. To me it means this. Stand firm in the gift of grace that He gave us. Times will get tough but remember what you know. We do not go through life to please those around us but to please God. He is and has the victory and since we are in Him, we have that victory as well.
There are a ton of verses in the Bible that refer to this word grace. And what it means to you may be different that what it means to me. Whatever it means to us, let us not forget the greatest act of grace is the fact that God sent his son to die for you and me. I don’t have kids so I can’t imagine making a sacrifice of this magnitude to offer grace or salvation to anyone. Whatever your definition may be or what this word means to you. Look at it as calling Christ by name as Grace. One of my favorite interpretations is by Phil Wickham in his song “Grace”. Check out this song and lyrics as he refers to the name of God as Grace.
“The sky is grey and the light is far
The sea is a rage within my heart
I turn my sight to the crashing waves
I cry in the night just to be saved
I need eyes to be my guide
I need a voice that’s louder than mine
I need hope I need You
Cause I can’t do this alone
Grace I call Your name
Oh won’t Your smile fall over me
I’m cracked and dry on hands and knees
Oh sweet grace rain down on me I need You grace
I pray for dawn a new day to live
I pray for mercy only Jesus gives
Though darkness falls and a million cry
I believe over all there’s a greater light shining for us”
As I mentioned in the beginning this word is special to me. I never want to forget the grace that I was saved by or where I came from. It was this thought that led me to get the word in Hebrew as a tattoo.
I am looking at the calendar and realizing that I have just about 90 days left before I leave for the Army. I cannot count how many people have asked, “Are you scared?” My answer has been no and will remain no! This is something that I am preparing for and have long desired to do and finally will get to embark on this challenge and follow this call.
Every one prepares themselves for challenges in different ways. It seems that some simply do not prepare, train or ready themselves in any way at all. While certain people will do the bare minimum, this reminds me of a bit of college! I would know that I have an exam or project and at times I would do what was necessary and nothing more. I was wrong in my approach as are so many people in the way they prepare for challenges or even life itself or in what habits they have.
It’s been proven that it takes 21 days to create a habit. 21 Days, that’s not even a month! What positive habits are you missing in your life that could allow you approach life and challenges so much more effectively?
The title of this blog is 1-21-90 for a reason. First of all, I know anything I do I have to face it each day and take that challenge daily to form a habit or see results. Secondly, if you can do something seriously and put your heart into it, for 21 days it will become habit and a part of the way you live. I have done this in my approach to working out. It has been well over 21 days but I know that I didn’t have the motivation I needed that first three weeks. But now that is has been over three months I love it and have incorporated in my life, mainly in preparation for what the Army will put me though! As for the 90 in the title, that is about taking the next step and pushing yourself harder and faster than you have before. It could be reading, working out, time with family, praying…it doesn’t matter. Once you have completed your 21 days, push for 90.
As I write this out I am a bit sore, I started my 90 challenge for myself with the workout program P90X. This is a DVD set of an intense daily work out. I am attacking this in the evenings and keeping up with my routines at the MMA gym I train at daily in the mornings.
So…challenge yourself to something more, see results and feel a positive change in your life. Take it one day at a time, decide what habits you would like to create and then take it to the next level.
If you want, post your comments here on what your focus will be and then update me and let me know how it goes!
How many times do you walk by someone who is hurting or crying? You don’t know them, you don’t owe them anything so you just raise your head, don’t make eye contact and keep going.What if you took the time to show someone you care? What could happen? This is something that has been heavy on my heart and so I wrote down what could happen. Enjoy.
“Show Me Home”
Closing time has come and gone and so we head on home.
The streets fill with laughter as they fall and stumble on.
As I walk I see a girl crying, sitting in the shadow alone.
Looking at her our eyes met and she lowered her head.
Trying hard to smile but her eyes overflowed with fear and sorrow.
It was plain to see she was hurting and trying to dry the tears that she shed.
Walking over I asked what is wrong, was she alright or could I call her a cab.
She didn’t say a word she just moved over and made room for two.
I sat and three minutes seemed like an eternity before she said one word.
I haven’t been drinking, I’m just lost and don’t know where to go.
The man in me said, where do you live, I’ll help you home.
Without looking up she pointed to the apartment building not one block away.
She started to open up and told me of the life she has led.
She said it’s my heart and soul, for years I’ve been lost even when in my own drive way.
I told her of someone she reminded me of that had been lost for a long time and just felt dead.
They had lived in darkness, confusion, and loneliness even in the midst of friends.
It wasn’t until they realized that they couldn’t do it on their own that they found their way.
When the story was over, I told her I was leaving and she asked me to show her home.
She said thank you as her face turned to joy from sorrow.
I have sat here so many nights for over a year hoping for someone to see me, show they care.
To be honest I haven’t had a reason to go on and I don’t know if I could have made it out here again.
One last question she said, what happened to your friend, today are they ok?
I grinned and said, it was the story of the prodigal son only in modern day.
As I got up, she smiled, wiped the tears from her face and said I’m home and now I know I can live for tomorrow!
This week has been harder than most. I have had to make choices and cut losses that I never thought I would have had to make, but I did. The good news is, the more I contemplate the choices I made, the more I have a peace about the decision. Today as I was driving towards Austin to stay the weekend with friends I just kept thinking about this past week and how life can change in an instant.
I have been training at Excel Fitness and MMA in Magnolia for a while now and have been learning all the basics so, I couldn’t help but relate it to fighting. To prepare for fighting I have to be first and foremost mentally ready to go against any opponent. I also have to be physically ready to do what it takes to; one, win and two, get back up when I get knocked down. Still before the fight and after the physical and mental preparation comes the last step, wrap up and glove up.
Why do this? It ensures I can strike my opposition with force but still keep the pain on my hands to a minimum and ensures proper support around the wrist. When training we are sparing. Sparing is usually done at 20-40% power and is a “friendly” training environment. But fights…what you are training for, is like what you see while watching UFC and other MMA style fighting. These guys enter the arena or cage ready to draw blood and end it in knock out or submission in a matter of seconds if possible. It is truly a feeling of fighting for your life.
I have to ask myself as I go through life and also train for the Army and I ask you, are you ready, prepared, trained and willing to fight for your life? I’m not necessarily talking about a fist fight till death. But let’s ask the question in regard to our dreams, passions, family, career and even faith. As I faced this dilemma this last week I had to know what the right thing to do was and prepare my heart for it. It took a readiness to stand firm despite emotional ties and baggage and losing someone I thought was a friend. But I had to stick to the core values I cherish and fight for a personal freedom from something that just was not healthy even though it may have been desirable.
I hope this makes sense on some level. If I was not prepared for the choice I made, or willing to fight for it, I would not have been able to do it. With that being said, if I did not do the right thing, this could affect my life on several levels and none of which would result with a positive outcome. Every single day we face the possibility of having to fight for our life. It could be standing up to someone emotionally, physically or even a spiritual battle. You can’t back down.
I encourage you to know what you want in life and understand what your goals and values are that you willing to fight for. By knowing and understanding your dreams and goals and familiarizing yourself with the obstacles in front of you, you are essentially sparing with the situation! You are learning your strengths, weaknesses and what it will take to overcome the issues.
One of my uncles has always said, “Long fights are for the movies”. He is so right, when situations arise, you don’t always time to think about it, you just have to stand up and fight. You need to be aware of your surroundings, train, prepare, wrap up and glove up because you never know when the bell will ring and you may have to fight of all fights for your life.
After writing this, I can’t help but think about John Mayer’s song, “War Of My Life” Check it out below.
Come out Angels
Come out Ghosts
Come out Darkness
Bring everyone you know
I’m not running
I’m not scared
I am waiting and well prepared
I’m in the war of my life
At the door of my life
Out of Time and there’s no where to run away
I’ve got a hammer
And a heart of glass
I got to know right now
Which walls to smash
I got a pocket
Got no pill
If fear hasn’t killed me yet
Than nothing will
All the suffering
And all the pain
Never liked to label
I’m in the war of my life
At the door of my life
Out of time and there’s nowhere to run
I’m in the war of my life
At the core of my life
I’ve got no choice but to fight ’til it’s done
No more suffering
No more pain
Never again
I’m in the war of my life
At the door of my life
Out of time and there’s no where to run
I’m in the war of my life
I’m at the core of my life
Got no choice but to fight ’til it’s done
So Fight on, fight on everyone, so fight on
Got no choice but to fight ’til it’s done
I’m in the war of my life
I’m at the core of my life
I’ve got no choice but to fight ’til it’s done
The time is fast approaching where I will be leaving for basic training. I am extremely excited and thrilled about the future and the challenges that I will get to overcome. The contract I have signed with the Army is for five years. These next five years I am sure will present a multitude of trials, tribulation and some terror. However I know while pursing my passion and call, I will achieve a greater physical and mental strength.
This decision was not the easiest to make, my heart said this is where I need to be, but my head tried to rationalize everything. This is a passion for me and something I have wanted to do for quite some time. It is one of those things that is easy to talk about but you may never do. I honestly think if I was not surrounded by the people I am, I would not have been able to make that call.
I am blessed with the friends and people that God has placed in my life. Several of them are choosing paths that are not the easiest but are following dreams and passions. Having these friends around kept things in perspective and when all seemed lost at some points, by their example kept reminding me what life is all about.
I remember seeing a quote and do not recall the author but it read, “Some do what others can’t because some do what others won’t”. Just to wrap this up, all I have to say those people is thank you for being here and thank you for doing something you love to do even when it’s not always easy. You have helped change my life and I am sure so many others.
This morning like so many other mornings I awoke to the sounds of a very obnoxious alarm clock. Without thought or hesitation I cut it off by hitting my snooze and saying I need ten more minutes. That ten felt like two, the alarm went off again and one more time, I said to myself, just ten more minutes. I woke up twenty minutes late, got ready for church in a dash and made my way.
On my way to church I felt so rushed, and had a realization that what if I had that same mentality in my spiritual life and my walk with God. Don’t get me wrong here, I am not saying I need to stay asleep so to say. What I am saying, what if in my prayer life or in ministry I couldn’t get enough and always had to have just ten more minutes.
It is so easy to get caught up in everything and put God off until later but there are days where later never comes. Anytime I over sleep or choose that snooze button it sets a tone for the rest of the day and more often than not, it is not a good one. What kind of impact on my life could it have if I said no to sleep and gave God that ten extra minutes? Imagine how great those days would be!
Tonight in our “Young Adults” bible study, we read and studied Romans chapter twelve. A verse that stood out to me and was discussed was verse 12, “Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer”. There is a lot to consider in the verse but the part that has lined up with the constant thought of ten more minutes today was where it says, “be constant in prayer”. With a command like this, it is easy to see that it is not about ten more minutes in prayer, but constant prayer. God is such a good God, who are we not to talk and communicate with Him constantly?
On another level, what if we take this ten minute mentality and applied it to other areas in our lives? Time with friends, family, laughing, working, working out, learning, and volunteering. The challenge I leave with to myself and to you is to wake up in these areas of your life. Let us find rest in God.
